Recipe Review: The Hell of Homemade Ice Cream

I coveted this baby for a long time:

Kitchen Aid Ice Cream Maker

And I was deliriously happy when I got it for Christmas. I literally pulled out the laptop right then and there (screw whatever other gifts I received that year) to start reviewing all of the recipes I pinned that could ONLY be created using this totally necessary tool.

Have you ever really looked at any of those ice cream recipes you’ve pinned? Even more importantly, have you watched the dessert round of Chopped and thought, “oh, that’s not too bad”?

When I mean not too bad, I mean the ease at which it seems to come together. The chefs throwing a couple of ingredients together, pouring it into the ice cream maker, then removing it at the right time. Seems pretty simple, especially if you have a recipe to follow.

NO. IT’S NOT SIMPLE.

The ice cream maker above is nothing like the Chopped ice cream maker. And if you get a craving for ice cream… well, better hope you still have it until tomorrow. Cause that’s how long it usually takes to actually make ice cream. Here’s the process:

Step 1: Think about making ice cream. Gather all ingredients. Realize you’re missing something. Go to store. Come home.

Step 2: Make your custard base thing. It involves boiling.

Step 3: Chill your base. Recipes typically suggest overnight. Freeze your ice cream maker at the same time because you can’t just keep it in your freezer since it’s so full… despite the fact that you have a chest freezer as well.

Step 4:  Next day, pour your base into the frozen ice cream maker WHILE THE CHURNY THING IS SPINNING. Curse because the maybe-soon-to-be ice cream splatters everywhere. Churn.

Step 5: Guess what? It’s still not ready to eat yet. Pour it into a container and put it in the freezer for a couple of hours.

And 25 days later, you have homemade ice cream! If that hasn’t made you tired, then here’s a couple of recipes I’ve taste tested, just for you:

Obviously my ice cream maker never got any use. Obviously.

Living/Dining Curtains: An Accidental DIY

I love all of these great tutorials on Pinterest that are all like “hey, you can SEW YOUR OWN CURTAINS!” and then they show you curtains in some superduper cute fabric. You’re all like “oh WOW. Those are so cute and that fabric is so effing amazing! I’m gonna do it! And since it’s DIY, it must save me a little bit of money, right?”
And then you find out that said cute fabric is either $12.99 per yard and you need, oh, approximately 12 yards or so for your windows and you realize that it’d cost more for you to make curtains that to GO BUY REALLY FANCY ONES. So you’re all like, “well, guess I’m back to the drawing board…”
And then you walk through Target and you find really cute curtains for $9.99 per panel. You chuckle at those poor saps sewing their curtains.
But then you go to hang them up and it’s like the curtains were meant to be hung on windows that are for babies or something and you hang them anyway because you’re impatient and the baby is only down for his nap for another 20 minutes.
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We’ve all seen this picture on Pinterest. My curtains were “don’t” and they weren’t even touching the ground. Fail.
But it just looks tacky. So tacky. So who’s laughing now? Definitely the ladies who have perfect DIY curtains.
So then you have to go rouge and DIY it without a tutorial. Oh, the horror. But I did it and now they’re not tacky! I ended up grabbing some cheap solid red fabric from IKEA for $2.99 a yard. I think(?) I picked up 2 yards to add to the bottom of each of my panels.
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Looks terrible from the back, but gives you an idea of how they’re constructed.
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See? Can’t even tell

I made 4 panels – two for the living room and one for the dining room.

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And aren’t we classy with a slightly bent living room curtain rod? Thank you, dear cat, for climbing the new curtains. At least he doesn’t chew up all of our phone cord chargers like other dear cat.

 

Delish: 2 fer 1 Deal

As my husband has said, while shoving the last of dinner into his mouth, “I don’t believe in leftovers.”
I personally hate leftovers. Well, all leftovers except for pizza. I’m too cheap and don’t like wasting, so I eat ’em. But it doesn’t mean I like it. However, if it’s reinvented leftovers, it often becomes much more tolerable.
In this 2 fer 1 deal, you can do just that. You’ll end up with leftovers that can be easily transformed into a kind of entirely different meal. The first meal is date-night fancy. The second meal is put on yer E&D* pants and lounge in front of the TV while shoving food in your mouth.
Meal 1:
Pork tenderloin in white wine sauce (leaves enough to give each of you a glass before you open a second bottle because only one glass on date night? we’re not that boring yet, are we?)
Sauteed haricots verts (because why call them green beans on fancy date night?)
Your favorite recipe for mashed potatoes
Meal 2:
Shepherd’s pie (chop up the leftover pork, use the leftover sauce/gravy, use the leftover mashed potatoes, grab a bag of frozen veggies) I kind of used this recipe as a guide.
Your favorite salad and/or bread (anytime I write bread I think of Oprah)
*Eating & Drinking

House Post Alert: Learning Lessons

It remains to be told whether we learned our lesson or not. I think we have, but then again, we’ll see how we feel by the end of this next project.

We’re starting another renovation. This, however, is different than the last one. Why is it different? Let me list the ways:

  1. We don’t have to move out because it’s not impacting the inside of the house.
  2. I did not design this time.
  3. We are not demoing.
  4. We are not painting.
  5. We hired a contractor to do it all.
  6. Nick is very happy.

If you don’t remember what the exterior of our house looked like, good for you. If you do, sorry. It’s ugly. So what’s it going to look like now?

TA DAH!

new-porch

Hellllooooooo outdoor living room. I’m already imagining an afternoon avec un verre de vin on the beautiful outdoor couch we don’t yet own. We’re also landscaping the front yard, replacing the deck and cleaning up the backyard a little bit.

Glorious, I tell you. Glorious.

Life is still pretty

It’s just busy! With a baby! Can’t believe how much time has flown by.

For those of you who have been eagerly waiting Part II: Floors (hah!), we did finally make it in. The timeline was pushed back two weeks and we were homeless for part of that. Luckily, Kelly’s friend was kind enough to loan us her apartment while she stayed with her then boyfriend (now fiance!)

All of the pain was worth it. The floors do look great and folks are typically surprised when I tell them they’re original.

Want to see what the house pretty much looks like now? Well… mostly. I know for certain that there’s several piles of books Alex has pulled down and strewn about.

This is the place to go. We had our wedding photographers turned friends come down and photograph the house and they captured it perfectly. There’s been some minor changes since then. And some major changes coming up (hint: the exterior’s asking for some love). Maybe I’ll even post them here!